Start With How You Want to Feel: Why Intentions Beat Goals in the New Year
A Fresh Start Without the Pressure
When January arrives, many of us feel the familiar pull to set new goals—promises to “fix” what didn’t go well last year or to improve ourselves in measurable ways. This is a deeply ingrained cultural habit, but it doesn’t always serve us. Resolutions often center on outcomes like “lose 10 pounds,” “organize the garage,” or “take a class.” There’s nothing wrong with these goals, but when we inevitably stumble or life shifts, we can slip quickly into shame, discouragement, or quitting altogether.
This year, I’m offering a different approach: using intentions to create a more sustainable and compassionate path toward a meaningful life.
What Are Goals?
A goal is typically a concrete, measurable outcome. Many people use the SMART framework—Specific, Measurable, Achievable, Relevant, and Time-bound.
Examples include:
“Go to the gym five times a week.”
“Cook three new recipes every week.”
Goals can provide clarity and accountability, but they’re often rigid and binary—success or failure. And that rigidity can feel daunting before new habits even get off the ground.
What Are Intentions?
Intentions are different. They serve as guiding principles for how you want to feel, show up, or live your life. They focus on identity and values—who you want to be—which research shows is far more motivating than focusing solely on behavior.
Examples:
“I want to feel more energized by moving my body daily.”
“I want to feel more present when I’m with my family.”
Intentions are flexible, process-oriented, and rooted in internal experience. They shape your choices without tying your worth to a specific outcome. They also naturally evolve as life shifts—because schedules, health, and energy will fluctuate throughout the year.
By easing pressure and reducing all-or-nothing thinking, intentions make consistent, sustainable change more achievable.
How Intentions and Goals Can Work Together
You don’t need to abandon goals altogether. Instead, let your intentions guide your goals. Think of intentions as the why and goals as the how.
For example, if last year left you feeling overstimulated or overwhelmed, you might set an intention to cultivate calm and steadiness. From there, aligned and realistic goals could look like:
“Take a 10-minute walk before tending to my kids each morning.”
“Wait to check my phone until an hour after waking so I can connect with myself and my family first.”
There are countless ways to support an intention of calm. Keeping the intention centered allows you to respond to your needs each day with more creativity and compassion.
Setting Your Intentions for the New Year
Here’s a simple reflective practice to help you begin:
Ask yourself: How do I want to feel this month (or this week, or this day)?
Choose 1–2 core intentions.
Examples: “I want to cultivate patience.” “I want to feel more grounded.”Brainstorm small habits that support those intentions.
Consider both thought strategies (self-talk, grounding, reframing) and action strategies (movement, routines, connection).Write your intention somewhere you’ll see it.
Mirror, planner, notes app, or phone widget.Revisit weekly or biweekly and adjust without judgment.
If you enjoy daily check-ins, Insight Timer is a great tool for keeping your intentions visible. The app and widget allow you to track your focus in a simple, accessible way—I started doing this myself two months ago, and it has helped me stay both accountable and centered.
Gentle Direction, Not Perfection
Intentions are not about perfection—they’re about direction. They give us space to be human while still moving toward meaningful growth.
Wishing you a grounded, compassionate start to 2026. May this year bring clarity, steadiness, and a deeper connection to the version of yourself you’re becoming.
